Groundhog day

Today was another day 1 day closer to lapband surgery one day closer to opitfast drinking one day closer to my life changing experience.....

I titled it Groundhog day because at the moment my days seem to be a repetitive cycle of getting out of bed feeding the kids palying with the kids watching tv waitiing for my husband to come home chatting then bed. Only to be repeaated the very next day..

I havnt got a stack of friends I choose qualitty over quanitiy and so I find myself falling in a dark hole which i think is why the weight has spiraled out of control.
Last night there was a show on called medical stories and there was what they call super morbidly obese people who were bedridden and were getting gastric bypass. Its strange some of theese people were 400+ lbs (over 250kg) and i kept thinking what they would give to be my weight MY WEIGHT!!! At least they could move around and go to the movies and play with their kids,its a strange thought but its true.

I sadly could really relate to these stories and to why they got that big and i think if i keep going there will be a point in my life where the weight will effect me more so where I will be physically unable to do thinks with my kids.

My weight is effecting me mentally but i guess the small change Ive noitced physically is not bothering to buy a good pair closed in shoes. Im always in "slip ons" so i dont have to bend over and put on socks. Its effecting my feet they are becoming cut Im only 29 and this is already affecting me. i see a relative of mine struggling with their weight and they are way in there 70's and i think im only 29 and im having this problem now. If i make it to 70 at this weight im really going to be bedridden.